Leah and I went out to celebrate our bartending certification with wings, shots, and air of sexual tension. We decided to visit our favorite cheap spot on West 4th with some of our friends from bartending school. Here’s what we figured out afterwards…
xoxo Parker Chase
Tuesday Night 6/2/09
Location: Down The Hatch
Parker:
1. To the guys…you can’t bring a wing woman out with you if she actually has feelings for you.
2. Yes, a shot of Jäger makes you happy, but any more shots of it afterwards just makes you incredibly horny.
3. Only in my world is “I’m a chef” a suitable pick up line.
4. Telling an annoying stranger who is trying to chat you up that your teacher (who is standing next to you) is your lover, seems to be a trusty cockblock AND a turn on to said annoying stranger.
5. If you do not turn off your phone before you go to bed, you will get a drunken call @ 5am from the gentleman you gave your number to.
BONUS: Is it a good night if all you want to do is go home and masturbate?
Leah:
1. If you feel the need to call someone out on his or her relationship bullshit, then do it!!
2. If your ex, girlfriend, friend, mom, sister, cousin, aunt, or baby’s mama thinks I am trustworthy…they are foolish.
3. I love having guy friends; they make the night more fun.
4. Pretending your homegirl is your ‘girlfriend’ to keep guys off is hot.
5. Hand holding makes me moist because I am a spinster who doesn’t get out
enough these days.
BONUS: Steeling the AA batteries out of the living room remote control for
my masterbational usage turns me on more.
Recent Comments